Hi, I was born into a very poor family, I was born in a poor area of my city, My family then moved to a poorer part of the city where our house was robbed and now we been living on a council estate in another poor part of the city. My father is an massive alcoholic (typical of sikh men these days), and my mother struggles to raise me and 2 brothers. Basically i feel that everything i do to try make my family and my life better, I get punished for. I have sold drugs to earn money to support my family, I've robbed from cars and people to earn money to support my family but this is because where i've grown up, it is very poor! and this is the only way to survive, we cant get jobs cause the rep of the area, we are stereotyped as thugs, and the success rate of my high school was 23 percent, I feel I do everything for people, I lift the world for them yet they do nothing for me and my life stays hell, i feel yet god continues to punish me, I feel I was destined for this hell i live in, I feel love fears me no girl likes me more than a friend and some girls say I scare them because of the bandanna i wear ( dont know how to spell it in indian), I dont always pray but I stay true to god in my heart, I've broken rules such as cut my hair, drank, ate halal, ate beef (not knowing) but i accept these and admit i am not a good sikh but when you live in a society that wearing a bandanna and having long hair is a thing to laugh at, how can you be a sikh in this day and age - dont get me wrong i beat up any one who tries to mock sikhism. I just need someone to tell me that if god knows im suffering then why doesn't he help me, I thought god loved everyone?
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